Former beauty pageant queen Elle Ellison shares seven valuable lessons she learned during her time in the pageant world, which have helped her navigate the complexities of love and relationships. These insights offer a unique perspective on dating, drawing parallels between the competitive nature of pageants and the challenges of finding a partner.
One key lesson is the importance of presenting a well-rounded self. Ellison emphasizes that in both pageantry and dating, it's not just about physical appearance. She argues that a man seeking a Miss USA title, focused on beauty and physical appeal, is different from one seeking a Miss America title, which emphasizes talent and being a well-rounded woman. This highlights the idea that in relationships, it's crucial to offer more than just physical attraction.
Ellison also stresses the significance of the interview process, both in pageantry and dating. She believes that winning over a guy with your personality can lead to a more profound connection and acceptance of your other qualities. This concept is supported by neuroscientist Dr. Lucy Brown and the late biological anthropologist Dr. Helen Fisher, who confirmed that first impressions and attractiveness go beyond physical features once you start talking to someone.
Another lesson Ellison learned is the value of being 'Miss Congeniality'. She advises picking and choosing battles in relationships, as men often try to shift the blame when things go wrong. This approach, she suggests, can help maintain emotional and spiritual insight, reducing the likelihood of repeating conflicts.
Ellison also encourages the use of enhancements, such as wigs, weaves, and fake eyelashes, in both pageantry and dating. She acknowledges that while natural beauty is essential, a little extra effort can make a significant first impression. However, she advises against using packaging tape or 'butt glue' for dates, as these are more suitable for special events.
Confidence is another crucial aspect highlighted by Ellison. She believes that confidence is what allows a woman to hold out for the best and not settle for less. A confident woman, she notes, will always go for the absolute best, whether it's an elegant gown or a man who treats her well. This confidence, she suggests, is what enables a woman to hold out for someone who meets her where she's currently at.
Ellison also advises being a good sport when it comes to rejection. She emphasizes that handling rejection gracefully is essential, as it often says more about one's self-worth than about the person who walked away. Life coach Caroline Maguire supports this idea, suggesting that the fear of rejection is hard-wired into us, and that the trick is to not let that sting define how we see ourselves or show up next time.
In conclusion, Ellison's insights offer a unique and refreshing perspective on love and relationships. By drawing parallels between pageantry and dating, she provides valuable lessons that can help individuals navigate the complexities of finding a partner. Her advice is both practical and thought-provoking, making it a must-read for anyone seeking to improve their dating game.